[Today I have a treat for you guys, a guest post from J.D. over at The Social Lifestyle, a Singapore-based site offering lots of great content of self-improvement and game in Singapore! I came across his site and loved the content, so I think you will too. Check it out if you want to learn about picking up Singaporean girls! -Sinapse]
Is Pick Up Different All Over The World?
One great thing about Singapore is that we pride ourselves on our multiculturalism, meaning that
chances are you can meet a lot of different types of girls just by cold approaching.
That said, there is still a slight difference in general when picking up in Singapore as compared to
friendlier and more open societies—specifically, Singaporean girls tend to have relatively higher
bitch shields. Because of this they might appear to be more arrogant, which some of them are, but in
general once you get past the initial stage of shock, they settle into conversations very easily.
Even the small gesture of saying smiling at a stranger or saying hi can be poorly received just
because it is such a rare occurrence. So that goes without saying that walking up to a girl on the
street and offering a compliment is something she might not expect and thus will cause her to react.
Any reaction is good; what you don’t want is for the girl to remain expressionless after you deliver
the opener. After that, knowing how to manoeuvre through the “mating dance” is key. That is,
turning the reaction into a positive experience for her.
A friend of mine put it this way, “Opening the girl is simply offering her the chance to experience
what it’s like within your reality. You’re not relying on a single line to completely and utterly seduce
her.” This is contrary to what most guys expect pick-up to be like: they look for the magic line that
will show the girl how cool they are.
This is the wrong mind set to come from whether you are in Japan, Korea, or Singapore.
Still, calibration is a huge part of the attraction process. Understanding their culture, history, and
social norms can give you a huge advantage when trying to pick up girls of a foreign culture. Being
socially savvy, I always say, is an indisputable fundamental aspect of good game.
If you remember the Julien Blanc fiasco from a year ago, where a European dating coach gained
notoriety online because he showed videos of him running around Tokyo and essentially “grabbing
girls and pushing their heads down to his crotch”.
Although this was heavily sensationalized, and does not reflect what actually occurred, it shows that
people in society take social norms very, very seriously. What matters is the girls’ perception of what
you are doing. If you are doing something that makes them uncomfortable, and you can see that
visibly, then stop.
However, don’t stop yourself before the actual approach. Approach, then calibrate after. Despite my
belief that Singaporean girls have higher bitch shields, I still approach anyway. And so far it has
worked out pretty well for me and other people I know who cold approach pick up too.
One specific way of displaying social savvy is pointing out the obvious. For example if she stops but
appears to react coldly or shyly, I will point it out to her. That usually relaxes them because I’m
implying that, “I understand how you feel, and it’s normal to feel awkward and I’m not trying to
pressure you into a conversation, though it’ll be nice to get to know you.”
I don’t actually say all those words, but pointing out her obvious internal state, coupled with the
appropriate nonverbal communications (leaning back) shows that I am socially savvy and not a
creepy guy who does not understand social norms.
That, I feel is the most important thing to take note of when approaching women in foreign cultures
or in new environments.
Ultimately, you can say that game is teaching guys how to be normal around women. It’s not that
difficult but it is helpful if you can get someone who is more experienced to point out the little ways
that you might be projecting the wrong signals to her either through your body language, or the
words you say.
If you enjoyed this article, you can read more over at my blog at The Social Lifestyle. Also, it’ll be
great if you could leave comments. I’d like to hear your thoughts on the subject.