December 10

Game in the Margins

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mar·gin

(mär′jĭn)

n.

1. An edge and the area immediately adjacent to it; a border.
2. The blank space bordering the written or printed area on a page.
3. A limit in a condition or process, beyond or below which something is no longer possible or acceptable

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As you compile your own model of the world through action and reflection, you will slowly start to absorb and codify all the pieces of advice and wisdom you have collected from others around you and through your own experience. Through that knowledge you develop your own system of interactions. All humans associate behavior with locations, times, manners, and modes of interacting.

 

A simple example.. Imagine a copy machine. Where is it and what is happening with it and around it.

 

Ok.

 

Chances are you thought of the copy machine in an office setting, under fluorescent lights, perhaps being operated by someone in a business suit, or spitting out printed copies of some report. You likely didn’t imagine the copy machine in a bar or on an airplane, although conceivably they could be there. This is normal mental behavior – we associate objects, behaviors, places, and actions all together in clusters.   With game we walk a fine line between solidifying important lessons into our own practice – things like always escalate, or keep moving the interaction forward – and becoming a slave to our conceptions. It’s crucial for you to examine in yourself when something is a useful generalization, and when it is a crutch that might be holding you back.

 

“Game in the margins” is a way to always push yourself not to be held prisoner of the rigid confines you construct within your own mind.   If you have a schedule that demands you wake up at 8:30 am, stop quickly at the conbini to inhale a rice ball, and arrive just in time for work at 9am, you have a very slender “margin for error”. An untimely red light, being accosted by a policeman, or a train rain delay could all leave you late for work. If you see a stunner on your way to work, you have no time to stop and talk to her. “It’s okay,” you tell yourself “I’m on my way to work. I’ll game when it’s time to game.”   No!   Game in the margins means make more time, a “buffer zone” of even 5-10 minutes in between your destinations. That way, you always have a minute to talk to the cutie while you’re on your commute.

 

Game in the margins means expand the places and times where you think you can game. If you only game in bars and clubs, try some cafe game, or talk to girls on the train platform or in shops. If you only game after work from 6-9pm, try gaming during your lunch break, or in the morning if you can. Whenever you get too locked into a pattern, you lose some of the spontaneity and charm which lights a fire in you and shines through your eyes as a little glint. Girls do pick up on this. Even something as simple as “Hey I’m in a huge rush for a meeting, but I thought you were cute, and lets meet up another time! Give me your number.” can make a big impression. You don’t need a long, monologuing approach to make a powerful connection.

 

Game in the margins means stretch your limits. Expand your horizon. Discard your crutches, your “rote” behaviors, your patterns. The more you give into chaos the more you will learn quickly – fast and loose.   Go back and read definition #3. Where in your game do you tell yourself something isn’t possible or acceptable? Are SNLs out of your reality? Dating your ideal girl? Orgies? Push your “margins” gradually and slowly in that direction, and it WILL happen.

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Tags

approach, chaos game


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